Menopause Monday: When Menopause Made My Anxiety Worse

Hello, ladies! I hope you had a relaxing weekend and are ready for a brand-new week!

I spent a lot of my time outside raking leaves! The weather was absolutely gorgeous! Some may have thought it was too chilly, but I actually enjoy working outside when it’s cool. I don’t have to worry about those darn flying insects when the temps are colder!

Raking leaves is also a great full-body workout. You know it is when you’re trying to get into bed at night and everything aches! 😂

We are kicking off the week with a menopause symptom that has affected my life for years now. I’m talking about anxiety.

Anxiety was something I had experienced at different times throughout my life, but when I entered my 50s, it seemed to become much more noticeable and, at times, much harder to manage.

Now, I’ve always considered myself a worry-wart. But, I started worrying more, especially about my family. I wasn’t sleeping well, wasn’t eating the best, and definitely had no energy to exercise. All in all, I wasn’t feeling good about myself.

Then the hot flashes and night sweats started, and I had no clue what the heck was going on with me! So, of course, my worries turned to my health.

Remember, ladies, as I mentioned in a previous post, menopause was NOT something my mom ever talked about. I guess that’s a blessing because, knowing my mom, I can only imagine that her symptoms were worse than any other woman’s! A bit of drama, from my Momma! 😂

What I didn’t realize at the time was just how much menopause could affect my anxiety. Even though anxiety wasn’t new to me, something felt different now. It seemed to show up more often, and a lot of times, it would come out of nowhere.

I could go to bed feeling perfectly fine and wake up the next morning with racing thoughts and worries. I remember on some days, it felt more like a chore to get out of bed, for fear of what the day ahead was going to feel like!

It was like anxiety would knock at my door without warning, walk right in, pour itself a cup of coffee, and stay for as long as it wanted! ☕

This went on for several years, and eventually, the anxiety started affecting something I never thought it would: driving.

Yes, I began experiencing panic attacks while I was driving. Now let me tell you, my friends, THAT was very scary!

It wasn’t so bad until I had to stop at a red light. That’s when those terrifying feelings would come over me. I would feel restless, trapped, and completely out of control.

I tried deep breathing. I tried talking myself through it. I repeated over and over in my head, “You’re okay, you’re okay!”

But in reality, I was feeling anything but fine.

And it was even worse when I had passengers in the car with me. I didn’t want to tell them what I was experiencing because I didn’t want to alarm them, and I was certain they wouldn’t understand anyway.

One day in November of last year, my oldest daughter was in the car with me. We were supposed to be out shopping and having some mother-daughter bonding time.

Well, let’s just say it wasn’t exactly the relaxing shopping trip I had pictured! 😂

As I approached an intersection with several cars ahead of me, I watched the traffic light slowly turn from green to red. My heart started racing as I gently stepped on the brakes.

And the panic set in.

I became unbelievably restless, moving around in my seat and trying to breathe. I remember placing my hands on the cold window and, at one point, putting my window down. I thought maybe the cool air would distract me from what was happening inside my head.

I don’t even think a loud marching band in the middle of the road would’ve cleared my mind that day! 🥁

My daughter asked me if I was having a hot flash because the temperature was only in the 30s that day.

Not exactly a warm summer afternoon!

I told her I was indeed having a hot flash. Little did she know how overwhelmed I was feeling internally.

Then came the worst feeling of all.

I felt like I needed to get out of the car and walk. I felt trapped in my own car.

Then I looked up and noticed the cars moving in front of me and that darn light had FINALLY turned green!

I felt like I had been sitting at that red light for hours! My body was sweaty, but I was never so happy to see that green light and the cars moving. How crazy is that?

That experience really opened my eyes to just how much anxiety was affecting my life. I knew I couldn’t keep trying to handle it all on my own, so I talked with my doctor.

And that conversation was an important one for me.

I also have to mention my husband because he has been so supportive throughout my entire menopause journey.

He has seen me on the good days, the not-so-good days, and everything in between. He has listened to me when I was worried, reassured me when I needed it, and never made me feel like I was being silly or dramatic.

Having someone beside you who understands that you’re struggling, even when they don’t fully understand what you’re going through or know how to fix it, means more than you realize.

And ladies, sometimes that’s what we need most. Someone who will simply take the time to listen and say, “I’m here.”

My husband has done that for me over and over again, and I am so grateful for him.

I also learned that asking for help isn’t a sign that we’re weak.

For a long time, I felt like I should be able to handle everything myself. But anxiety doesn’t always work that way. Sometimes we need to talk to someone. Sometimes we need to make changes in our daily lives. And sometimes we need additional help from our doctor. All of that is perfectly fine.

We are always taking care of everyone around us. But what about us, ladies?

Don’t we deserve to take time for ourselves? I’ll be honest, this is something that I still struggle with.

For me, learning what my body needed during menopause made a huge difference.

I’ve learned how important exercise is for me, even when I don’t feel like doing it. I’ve learned that what I eat can affect how I feel. I’ve learned that getting enough rest matters.

And I’ve also learned to give my worries over to God. That has been a very important part of my journey, too.

Am I completely worry-free these days? You must be kidding me…absolutely not! 😂

I’m still me!

But I understand my anxiety better now, and I know what I need to do when those anxious feelings come knocking.

Most importantly, I know I don’t have to face them alone.

If you’re dealing with anxiety during menopause, I hope you’ll talk with someone you trust, and, if needed, your doctor. You don’t have to quietly struggle through it or feel like you’re the only woman experiencing these things.

And maybe that’s one of the reasons I wanted to share this today.

Menopause can bring so many changes that we aren’t always prepared for.

Sometimes we laugh about them, sometimes we cry about them, and sometimes we simply wonder, “What in the world is happening to me?”

But when we start talking to one another, we realize something very important. We are not alone, and often, just knowing that can make all the difference.

This pretty little mug was a gift from my sister. I just love its sweet message! ❤️

Enjoy this beautiful day, and I’ll talk to you tomorrow.

~Chelle Noelle~